asher is 10 months!

dear baby,

I can't believe you are only a couple months away from toddlerhood. In less than 2 months, you will no longer be a baby-baby but a toddler-baby (*sob*). what a gift you have been to us and what joy you fill our hearts and our lives with! this has been a really fun month (and what a fun age!) you learned so many things this month! 

at 10 months, 

• you are crawling everywhere, climbing everything and standing yourself up all day. you can stand without any support for about 5 seconds (when you use both your hands to hold your snacks) and you can walk with support. you can even take a few steps only holding mama's hand. walking is surely in our near future!
• you loooooove to eat! and you eat a lot (you have been pooping crazy amounts 2-3 times a day and it is stanky!) you are usually not picky but definitely love to eat snacks, fruits, meats and noodles. you also love all vegetables and I hope you always like to eat healthy! 
• you are so, so silly and such a ham! you are always playing peekaboo, hiding behind a corner and popping out to scare me and just making us laugh all day long! it's been so fun to see your little personality come out. you are also a huge flirt and have lots of ae-gyo with girls (most definitely get that from daddy....)
• you are like a little sponge and you are learning so many things! you know how to say "more/please" and do it in the most adorable way and I give you way too many snacks because I succumb to your charm. you can wave hi, and bow when you say thank you (although you are only at a 20 degree angle right now..) and can clap your hands and pray on command! 
• you don't have any words yet but you say "ba ba" and "da da" all the time but I dont think you're trying to say anything in particular. you are the most vocal when I'm about to give you food or snacks though. you ma boy
• you are learning how to share and you even share your 'kka kka' (snacks) with mommy! you are a little bit more stingy when your snacks are small but we're working on it! 
• we (finally, hopefully, maybe) are done with your 8-10 month sleep regression (for now...) it lasted about 7 weeks and mama was so, so tired but we are so happy that you are finally napping for more than 20 minutes. praise the LORD!
• you are not super affectionate with me (always trying to escape my bear hugs and kissing marathons!) but when you are tired/just up from your nap - you rest your head on my chest and i don't breathe or move because i am so happy and my heart is bursting and exploding into a thousand pieces. I hope you become more affectionate! currently, when I ask for a kiss you just give me your forehead to kiss...lol.

though there have been some things that have been hard this past month (i.e. daddy being really really busy with work and only being able to see you for a few hours on weekends) you have been such a sweetie pie and such a trooper through it all. every day is truly a gift that I do not deserve and so I am trying to find evidences of God's grace in every single day we have together. and to be honest, it's not hard at all to find things I'm thankful for when it comes to you! 

last night, we found out who our new president will be for the next four years. in the last 12 hours, many in our nation have become paralyzed in fear with what our future will hold under the leadership of his new leader. to be honest - there have been a couple instances even in the last few hours that I felt overcome with worry about the country + world that you will be growing up in.

but this world has always been broken. it is not any more broken today than it was yesterday, or than it was when you were born 10 months ago. you were born into a sin-ridden, flawed world -- broken by sin and hopeless in and of itself. so you see, I am not surprised nor am I more afraid of the future than I was yesterday.  the brokenness of this world that you & i both live in is not gonna be saved by a different president, or more money, or better solutions to global warming, different laws, etc. ultimately the only hope that we have in this world is that God is always in control. we don't have to fear the future of our nation or the uncertainties of this world because we know and trust in the God who holds it in His hands. nothing is beyond His control. 

"let every person be subject to the governing authorities. 

for there is no authority except from God 

and those that exist have been instituted by God"

R O M A N S 13:1

there are surely many scary times ahead. we will be tested, i'm sure. there are going to be hard things that we will face in our life and as your mama, it pains me to think that I can't save you or spare you from all of it. but I pray that as we endure and persevere through this life together, that we will learn to trust and obey God in all things and that you will come to see at an early age that we can have hope, even in times like these. an incomprehensible hope that is unwavering and sure. that is my greatest hope and prayer for you.

xoxo,

your mama

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone. The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. P H I L I P P I A N S 4:4-7