hello, world, meet baby tseng. :)
he's here!
after months of waiting, worrying, praying, trusting, and waiting some more -- he's finally here and he's pretty much perfection in baby form. we are so, so happy and completely enamored with our little guy. the adventure of getting him here was pretty crazy. we were in the hospital for a whopping 5 days - and now we are finally home to tell our tale.
after months of waiting, worrying, praying, trusting, and waiting some more -- he's finally here and he's pretty much perfection in baby form. we are so, so happy and completely enamored with our little guy. the adventure of getting him here was pretty crazy. we were in the hospital for a whopping 5 days - and now we are finally home to tell our tale.
as you know - his due date was new years day! on my last doctor's check up (tuesday), I had not been dilated at all and the baby's head was still pretty high up in my pelvis. he was "not engaged", as my doctor said. my doctor told me that I would probably deliver later than expected, and that if I hit 41 weeks, he would induce me. we were hoping that it wouldn't come to that, but looked forward to enjoying our last few weeks together before baby's grand debut.
on new years morning, I woke up feeling a little bit wet. I wasn't sure if it was anything at all, so I put on a pantyliner to wait it out and see. my family was going to be coming over that afternoon for the traditional new years eve meal, ddukgook, so we decided to have a light breakfast and make pancakes. I was in the kitchen and had just put the first two pancakes on the grill when I felt a little trickle. I rushed to the bathroom and low and behold saw the blood-tinged stain on said pantyliner. my water had broke! (or at least I had started leaking..) I called eugene over and told him what I thought was happening and we just looked at each other said a bunch of uncomprehensible words, rushing from room to room to get things ready to go. I called the the labor & delivery unit and then called doctor and told them what happened. my doctor told me to come to the hospital as soon as I could, and I asked him if I could shower first. so of course I showered and blow-dryed my hair.
of course we also stopped by a starbucks drive-thru to get a drink. (lol, dont judge).
on new years morning, I woke up feeling a little bit wet. I wasn't sure if it was anything at all, so I put on a pantyliner to wait it out and see. my family was going to be coming over that afternoon for the traditional new years eve meal, ddukgook, so we decided to have a light breakfast and make pancakes. I was in the kitchen and had just put the first two pancakes on the grill when I felt a little trickle. I rushed to the bathroom and low and behold saw the blood-tinged stain on said pantyliner. my water had broke! (or at least I had started leaking..) I called eugene over and told him what I thought was happening and we just looked at each other said a bunch of uncomprehensible words, rushing from room to room to get things ready to go. I called the the labor & delivery unit and then called doctor and told them what happened. my doctor told me to come to the hospital as soon as I could, and I asked him if I could shower first. so of course I showered and blow-dryed my hair.
of course we also stopped by a starbucks drive-thru to get a drink. (lol, dont judge).
at the hospital parking lot with our caramel macchiato
we got to the labor & delivery triage and told them that my water broke. they quickly got me a room and hooked me up to a monitor. they put me on one of those disposable doggy pads and told me they were gonna see if I leaked more. we watched guardians of the galaxy while waiting and I didn't leak all that much during the entire movie.
Because I didn't leak all that much more, they said that it could possibly be just a "bloody show" and not my actual water bag breaking. So they swabbed the fluid and had to check to see if it was actually amniotic fluid that was coming out. We had to wait in anticipation to see whether or not it was baby time or if this was a false alarm + we would be sent home. Eugene said that if we had been sent home, it would have been really anticlimatic because we had hyped it up so much during the drive there. He looked over the test and said that it looked like it was negative (one line), but when the nurse came back in - she actually said that it was positive because there was a super super faint second line, indicating that my water did indeed break!
in the l+d triage room waiting for more leakage!
Because I didn't leak all that much more, they said that it could possibly be just a "bloody show" and not my actual water bag breaking. So they swabbed the fluid and had to check to see if it was actually amniotic fluid that was coming out. We had to wait in anticipation to see whether or not it was baby time or if this was a false alarm + we would be sent home. Eugene said that if we had been sent home, it would have been really anticlimatic because we had hyped it up so much during the drive there. He looked over the test and said that it looked like it was negative (one line), but when the nurse came back in - she actually said that it was positive because there was a super super faint second line, indicating that my water did indeed break!
After confirming that my water broke, I had to be admitted because I was +GBS and needed to get started on antibiotics. They also told me that they would have to induce me in a few hours if I didn't start having contractions, since there was higher risk of infection after the water break. I was only having very small and infrequent ones by this time. We got ushered into our l&d room and the nurses were sweet enough to rush me into one of their only ocean view rooms. After coming into our room, it felt a lot more real -- especially after we saw the baby warmer! We were starting to get super excited and nervous at the same time! He was coming and it was definitely feeling more and more real.
I got hooked up again to monitor my contractions and baby's heart-rate. It was like a dream come true being able to hear his little heartbeat continuously for hours on end. It was so sweet and lovely. He felt so near but so far away at the same time. I had saved a freebie temporary tattoo that I had gotten from Oh Hello Friend and I was so excited to use it for this perfect day.
By the time I got to the L&D unit, I was only 1-2 cm dilated, 50% effaced and the baby's head was still really high up. Because I was progressing slowly, by 1pm I was induced. They started pitocin at a low rate and gradually increased the dose throughout the day. The baby's head was still so high up and it was rotated at a weird angle so they made me do these weird things on a birthing bouncy ball and lay down and stretch in really strange positions. 12 hours after being induced I didn't progress at all! We were trying not to be too discouraged and trying to stay positive! My contractions at this point were getting really, really painful but I was trying not to get an epidural til the pain was unbearable because I was afraid that it would cause an even greater delay. However, because I kept tensing up so much with the pain, they said that I was probably being counterproductive by not getting it so I caved and called for my epidural.
morning after the epidural!
Let it be known that the epidural is God's gift to women. Amen, amen. I literally almost kissed the anesthesiologist after the medications kicked in. I went from being in fetal position and being in tears and calling out for Eugene to help me find the call light button (he was really deep asleep, lol) to being completely relaxed and comfortable. I didn't feel the contractions at all... it was amazing. I couldn't stop smiling, even when they were putting in my foley catheter, haha! I honestly almost changed our child's name to "epidural". It was amazing. Having the epidural also helped me to progress better because I was more relaxed and it let my uterus do it's thing. A few hours after getting the epidural I went from 1-2 cm to 5cm, and was now 80% effaced. They also realized that my water bag had never broken, but rather had been nicked somewhere up top, which caused the leaking. This also explained the delayed progress of my labor. A doctor came in that morning and broke my water bag and about 2 hours later I progressed to 6-7cm.
After that it was just a waiting game. The biggest issue was the baby's head's position - still too high and still angled really weird in my pelvic cavity. My doctor said that he would let me keep trying for a regular delivery, as long as the baby's heart-rate held. The baby was doing so well, even though I had been in labor for so long. However, by 12pm, I was 9cm dilated (finally the end was near!) but no change in the baby's position. A few hours later, my urine started to get blood-tinged and this was concerning to the nurses. My nurse decided to let me try pushing to see if that would help me dilate to a 10 and cause the baby to drop a little bit. I pushed twice but there was no change. My cervix and baby's head was unchanged - so they gave me their honest opinion and said that I could try pushing for another two hours, but that I would probably still end up with a c-section. At this point, I had already been in labor for 27 hours so we decided that I would just stop trying and go forward with the c-section.
They prepped me and took me to the coldest OR room ever. I was scared but Eugene was so sweet and reminded me the entire time that he was nearby. When they started my anesthesia, I started to get really violent shakes and felt really delirious and tired. All I remember is repeatedly saying that I felt tired. This made me pretty sad because I was afraid that I wouldn't remember the baby's delivery at all. It was really fast once they started and I just remember trying with all my might not to fall asleep. Then the first cry came, and immediately - TEARS. Ugh, it was hopeless. I was so delirious and out of it but felt an overwhelming amount of emotion. The hardest part about having a c-section is having to wait to see the baby. They took the baby to the warmer to clean him up and do his checks, and they called Eugene over. My sweet husband turned and asked if it would be okay to go see the baby. Of course I wanted him to.
I could hear him talking to the doctors about how long he was and Eugene would call out to me every now and then telling me that he was so cute and looked healthy! They talked about different features of his face and I just remember crying and trying with all my might to stay awake and keep my eyes open. I was happy to find out that Eugene got to cut the umbilical cord and the OR staff was so sweet to offer to learn how to use our GoPro so that they could take photos. When they were getting ready to bring him to me, I was still shivering pretty violently from the anesthesia. Eugene came and had to steady my hand. Then they brought him over for me to see him and I started to cry so much -- Eugene said that the tears poolled in the corners of my eye sockets because I was still laying flat as they were closing me up. It was overwhelming but I was so thankful that I was able to be alert enough to remember that moment.
They took us to the recovery unit soon after. My uterus was really "boggy" from being in labor for so long so it didn't contract the way it was supposed to after the baby was born. They were concerned that this would cause me to have excessive bleeding so they gave me a bunch of different medications (an IV drip, another med through my IV and one under my tongue) to help my uterus out. This apparently is known to cause really bad shivers as well, so I was pretty miserable from chattering my teeth and trying to keep my hands steady to hold the baby. I was given some medication to help with my shivering because I really thought my teeth were gonna fall out if we didn't do something quick. I was also really adamant about doing skin-to-skin immediately after the baby was born, so as soon as they were able to warm him up, they put him on my chest. They also let me try to nurse him right away (which is what I told everyone I really wanted to do) and he immediately latched. It was amazing. I had watched so many videos on this while being pregnant, and so I was really thankful that I was able to experience it myself, even though I had a c-section.
Downstairs, all of our family waited to hear the news of the baby's birth. Most of them had come shortly before I was wheeled away for the c-section so I didn't even get to really see them for too long.
One of the biggest blessings of my marriage to Eugene has been the beautiful way that our two families have grown to love one another. It was so special to have both sides of the family there, waiting for the baby to arrive!
I had to stay in the recovery unit for 1-2 hours, so of course everyone was anxious to see the baby! Once my shivering stopped and I was able to close my eyes for a bit- we decided to try and facetime my family from the recovery room so that they could see him!
The nurse that I had was able to get me another ocean view room in the mother baby unit and I was wheeled away shortly before the nurses' shift change. (I hated being "that" patient, lol! always a nurse.) After getting to the mother baby unit, we were able to call our families over to see the baby face to face. I kept him next to me all the time. I couldn't stop looking at him and reaching out to touch him all through the night. The nurses kept telling me to sleep, saying that this would probably be my last chance to since babies are generally really sleepy for the first night, but I just wanted to hold and cuddle him all night. So I did. hehe.
The next few days we got to spend recovering, learning how to care for a newborn and just enjoying our first days as a family of three. My time at the hospital was so sweet and it was more than I could've ever asked for. The sweetest part for me was seeing Eugene become a dad. He is already so sweet and natural with him and my heart bursts when I see them together. He also took such good care of me during the first few days of my recovery (and bought me from the café every morning!) Thankfully, I was able to recover pretty quickly. I started eating regular food just a few hours after my surgery (I was so hungry because I hadn't eaten for 52 hours!) and started walking only 12 hours after my surgery. I was so thankful!
Even though we were learning/adjusting to our new lives as parents, our hearts were so full and we couldn't get over how much love we had for this little guy. It's really an incredible feeling becoming a mom. I wanted to soak up every second and every minute I had with him because I knew he wasn't gonna stay this little for long. There was a lot of cuddling and kissing in those first few days.
And just like that we became a family of 3.
We know that our lives are forever changed with this little guy. Baby has already brought so much joy to our lives and to our families and we can't wait for what's to come. We are so thankful to the Lord for our beautiful son and for his grace and faithfulness to us during our transition thus far. We know that ultimately, we are stewards of his sweet little life and are praying that we'll be able to be faithful in loving and raising Him in a way that honors Christ. :)
Please pray for us!
xoxo
xoxo
Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.
James 1:17
